A man asked the question "Why Be faithful if they think your cheating anyways?... that's the question that all the dudes with insecure ass females need to ask themselves?"
At first I had great pause to answering this question,because to me it seems that sometimes we ask what we already know!Maybe it's a deep down feeling we have that we are wrong or about to commit an error and need to feel justified in it to do so. However how do you know when you have gone too far, and your about to make that terrible mistake, or you have pushed someone into thinking you have? Then the question of what does it take to secure a person in their feelings is the next one! In addition to that the question of why does love drive you to question it, and why does questions push people away? I often think that the past has a lot to do with the present, and the footing you start with has a path of it's own. Not saying that a cheater can't ever change and want to be faithful, but yet and however it's hard to trust! Then the question of where does blind trust and honest trust start? The difference is that blind trust is where you don't see what is going on around you, and you choose not believe what you hear or even see! Then you have honest trust which is where you stand by that person no matter what rain or shine, and you believe in your heart that they are where they say and doing what they claim. Now when I did answer this question I was a little hurt to be honest because I often wonder if I pushed this question myself?
My Response:
"Wow, Where did this come from? However it's a two way street. You leave the door of insecurity open long enough someone is going to walk through it! It's not about her feeling insecure but can you secure her, and check her doubt at the door! At the same time it applies to men who accuse women of cheating because they have a lot of male friends or friendly. A lot of times it's our actions that lead to doubt and sometimes women will let it slide because we don't want to be called insecure but that's what you lead us to feel! Not you personally but the situation at hand, and yet sometimes most people will use that as an excuse to do wrong and cheat! "Well they think I am anyway, so might as well prove it." Wrong because see then your the bad guy it's better to communicate and deal with it when it comes up. Rather then ignore it or sweep it under the rug, however I have learned that sometimes you can push people into things you never thought you could! Many times it hard to deal with things like this cause no one wants to be cheated on, but you keep leaving enough questions unanswered, and throw enough fits! What else are you suppose to think other then there is something to hide! I have learned that sometimes you can do it all and still have him cheat so, and same to women a man can be amazing but she still messes up and cheats. But the point is not to punish the next person! A lot of times God will hand you what you ask for, or give you a second chance to redeem yourself, but it's up to you! I guess not pointing fingers at all just saying that sometimes it's the image you give that leads to the questions and doubt you get! My thoughts I could be wrong though I have been before! But whatever brought this on sorry about that! And I'm apologizing too for all the trouble on my end, and I know I was the downfall and just horrible to you really, but I apologize so sorry! But that's what friends are for right you mess up and they forgive you I hope!"
So I guess the question is how do you answer that question? And then how do you go about living that answer, are we just humans that get pushed into these feelings? Or maybe I'm wrong and it's more then that but we are just too blind to see it! I often wonder if it's the karma of our actions that lead to such doubt in our lives. Like if you were a better man then you wouldn't have to ask why she doubts you? However if she was handling her business would she have to question if you were creeping? Then if no one is at fault or error and your both taking care of each other then why is there doubt in your minds? Where does this doubt come from and how come we can't just wash it away? I often think that sometimes it would be better not to have a heart at all, but then the fact you can't feel pain is great! However you can't feel pain you can't possibly feel joy,happiness, pleasure it will be gone too. So I guess how do you answer this is what I'm left with and how do you securely be with anyone?
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